Fear part 2

Fear is a funny thing. Its tied up with worry, anxiety, and my imagination. When I managed restaurants, it was one of the reasons I was successful; I used that worry and fear, to run my employees into the ground making sure everything was just right. I was successful in the eyes of my peers and my boss, but I was wildly unhappy and miserable. So not really a success. But now, here on the walk; there is no one else, no one to appoint guard duty, lookout, or scout. Finding a spot for the night is only easier because I have done it before. Not for any other reason. What if someone saw me make the mad rush into the woods. What if someone spots me once my camp is made. What if I picked the one spot all the good ole boys use for target practice. So many what ifs. So much worry. And all to no good use, but to make me miserable. I have to trust myself that I picked a good spot where I wont be easily observed. If I happen to be on someone's land and they happen upon me, I apologize and leave I also have bear spray that shoots 30 feet, just in case some good ole boys wanna make trouble for me. The key to camping early, is to make a stealthy retreat, but then to camp in the deep woods. Instead of 50 feet, go 100 or more. I'm in a fairly hard to get to place, down an embankment, and into the woods 30 feet. I hear the thunder outside my tent, which is why I decided to camp. I'm sleeping on a slope, which turns out to be not that bad. I also wont wake up in a puddle. I think a big learning curve for this walk, is a compromise between preventative thinking and faith. I'm big on the first, and a new student of the second. But I'm still walking, and that's something.